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21 Questions with… Comedic Legend Joan Rivers

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Image: Charles William Bush

We ask comedic icon Joan Rivers our 21 questions. Find out what she does when she's stressed (it involves Charlie Sheen) and tune in to QVC this Friday at 7 p.m. (ET) to see her live.

  1. When I get dressed in the morning I think… my naked body is a bigger disaster than the BP Oil spill.
     
  2. I would never leave my home without… being fairly certain I can still remember my address.
     
  3. The item of clothing I'm currently wearing most is… holding up my breasts. Unfortunately, I’m talking about my support hose.
     
  4. One luxury item I'm dying to splurge on… a gold plated defibrillator.
     
  5. The celebrity most in need of a makeover is… Nicki Minaj. She’s got more junk in her closet than she does in her trunk.
     
  6. The best thing about my QVC collection is… the pieces are like my children. Except, you never regret making them.
     
  7. What I love about jewelry is… you can change it for something else without surgery.
     
  8. My main beauty essentials is… darkness.
     
  9. When I'm low on energy I… take a sip of what Charlie Sheen is drinking.
     
  10. When I'm stressed I… complain, criticize and rant. So obviously I’m stressed all of the time.
     
  11. I would never travel without… calling my Jenny Craig counselor first. Those airport Cinnabons smell sooooooo goooood!
     
  12. If my days had one extra hour… my makeup would be even heavier.
     
  13. The key to dealing with criticism is… do it from the back of a limo.
     
  14. When I watch myself on TV I think… That old man is funny as hell.
     
  15. When it comes to doing standup these days… I’m just grateful I CAN stand up.
     
  16. If there's one thing I regret saying on camera… I’m sure as hell never going to admit it. 
     
  17. The celebrity with the best style is… Victoria Beckham. She can put an amazing look together with one hand tied behind her back.
     
  18. The person I'm dying to get as a guest on Fashion Police is… Anna Wintour because she’s just SOOOOO much fun.
     
  19. My biggest fashion pet peeve is… designers sending Jon Hamm clothes. Let’s just keep him naked!
     
  20. The last thing I Googled… "recently deceased celebrities" and, good news, I'm not on the list!
     
  21. One joke that never gets old… A friend just flew Alitalia and loved it. The plane was easy to spot. It was the only one with hair under its wings.

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