Carla Bruni is Probably in Labor RIGHT NOW.

Hey everyone. I thought you’d be curious to hear that French First Lady Carla Bruni is currently in labor. Probably. OMG. Rumors that the model/musician’s second child is mere hours away from gracing our sad, pathetic lives with his/her existence have spread across the Internet, but we can’t fully confirm that the baby is almost done because it’s not like Bruni or her husband Nicolas Sarkozy have been considerate enough to tweet a pic from the hospital room. Manners: the French don’t have them.

Just because I’m already on a roll with national stereotypes, I might as well mention that Bruni’s been working extra hard to be a caricature of a glamorous Frenchwoman: just a couple weeks ago, the First Lady moaned to a reporter that she couldn’t wait to finish up birthing her child so that she could go back to drinking and smoking. She really said that! The First Lady! To a reporter! And her nation just ignored it and went back to tying scarves and making out on the street. Wow. I think my heart is melting, I’m so moved.

Anyway, get your fill on the Carla Bruni pregnancy news because she’s not going to get a ton of attention for it from her own countrypeople. Bruni recently mentioned that no one in France cares about her pregnancy. Like, at all. Not even her mother, really: “There isn’t much to say. So many women are expecting children and giving birth, and it’s so uninteresting for French people.” That sounds so…reasonable? Can’t process.

[Styleite]

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